Mid-Sem | The Beginning of An End?

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Assalamualaikum w.b.t.

 Hi guys. Sleepy huh? Its 2.00 am already. You all should feel sleepy. Me? I'm already sleep by the time I finished writing this post :P

 The last few weeks had been really a huge setback for me. I had to face three examinations which I never ready for. Since I got the feeling to exchange my major, everything become blur to me. I have no longer vibrant to study like the two semesters before. I don't see any target, any mission to be accomplished because of this feeling. My mood also now unpredictable. Sometimes I feel happy and most of the time I feel nothing. Felt like I am nobody. Just a body with nothing to do with this gigantic world. -,-'

Tired with all these things. Need a new beginning.
 So back to the exam that I had been through, the first one is Chemistry 1. 50-50! That's all I can conclude for my Chemistry exam. I did some revision before the exam, but I don't think its ample. But I just can't do more. I got no strength to revise it all. Even seeing my roomate been doing exercise night and day, I don't affected at all. On the day of the examination, I'm acted like every exam I sat before. I can answer the questions, but I don't really sure what did I wrote on the paper. After the exam, we had a week of break. I didn't really enjoy the break as after I had my dental appointment at HUSM I got fever. The pain inside my tooth really made me uncomfort for a few days. A week after that, I went back to CFSIIUM. And my head still dizzy at that moment.

 Last Friday, I had my Physics II exam. This time I quite enjoyed the questions as I kinda like this subject. I don't know why but Physics is kinda fun. But not Math and Chemistry. They were both killers! But the exam also did not went well. This time we got a really annoying kid throughout the examination which held for 2 hours. We, Physics II G66 students had examination at LY016. Unfortunate for us as the invigilator brought her kid there. Urghhh! That kid really annoyed us. Screaming. Running around. We totally can't focus on the questions given. The invigilator herself just let her kid play around and make noise all around the LY Building. But thanks to Allah that I managed to answer it. But same with Chemistry 1, I don't really sure whether I answered it right or wrong. Whatever happen, happen. Nothing can be done already. Just let bygone be bygone.

 The next day was the most terrible day for me. The Math II exam! I am really lack of skills on this subject. In class I try to focus 200%, but nothing! I can't absorb what the lecturer teach me. It just like I know this and that throughout the class session, but after that everything GONE! Just gone. I did bought the compilation paper of last semester questions. But I can't really answer them. Even I questions! So the night before the exam I just take a look at the answers given. Hoping that I would understand something. But that also already happen. So just let it be. During the exam, I just use the first hour to answer the questions. After that I was doodling my question papers. Drawing this and that. I had thought deeply, I will drop this subject after this. I can't do it anymore. I'll just breaks my lecturer hope if I continue the class I guess.

Hope that I'll not ended up regretting for trying new things

 After days of days thinking and deciding, I had made my final decision. I will stop doing engineering. I will exchange my majoring next semester. But my choice is still secret. Whether I'll go to Economics, English or Architecture study. What I am really sure is that I am no longer an engineer. I had gave up! I think this is the best for me. Eventhough I kinda love physics but physics alone is not enough. I hope that I had made a right decision and I hope there will be no problems in exchanging my majoring here in IIUM. in shaa Allah :)

Assalamualaikum w.b.t.
Good night :)

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